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Tackling difficulties
by Jack Tsang
There are many books and courses teaching people how to handle difficult tasks, but few discuss the mindset you need. Adequate mental preparation can reduce the degree of difficulty by half. Life is sometimes hard because we unconsciously make it so with our fear of, and resistance to, change.
A word game can illustrate the mental elements of difficulty. The word "difficult" can be deconstructed into two parts where "diff" means "different" and "cult" means "cultures". In many situations, it's difficult to complete a task as a result of cultural differences.
My friend Joey told me about his career transition. After university, he joined a large company where he got promoted to a manager in only years. He quit his job last year and formed his own venture with a couple of partners. Since then he has had difficulties in managing his small firm in contrast to his previous role which involved leading a team. The problems mainly came from the three main types of stakeholders in his business - customers, employees and owners.
The customers are demanding, picky and price sensitive and Joey has to spend a lot of time in negotiations with them. The employees don't fully comply with the firm's internal rules and procedures, such as punctuality. And his business partners, who had previously worked only at small firms, worry too much about the firm's financial health and often limit his budget.
Explaining these problems to me, Joey realised he was working in a different cultural environment. When he was with his ex-employer (an industry leader), the customers had little bargaining power. Employees there were more educated, highly paid, and therefore more self-disciplined.
After setting up his own business, Joey was faced with people of different cultural values and beliefs. He asked me how to resolve the difficulties in managing his relationships with them.
I reminded Joey there was an "I" (ego) in the middle of "diff(erent)" and "cult(ures)". He had unconsciously insisted his working approach was the right one, which had operated well at his former workplace but not in his new environment. I suggested he put himself in others' shoes and appreciate the merits of their cultures. Then when he had surrendered his ego, he could visualise the other side of the picture.
Joey's current employees are more creative and energetic than those in his previous company. Also, given their closer relationship with a small firm, customers are generally more willing to give business referrals to Joey. In addition, the prudence of his business partners helps correct his tendency to overspend. When Joey put aside his "I", what was once difficult became less so.
This empathic use of mental preparation can be applied to other instances of perceived difficult tasks: Firing a subordinate is less of a struggle if you think of him not as bad, but instead that his working style is unsuitable for your team.
Becoming a first-time father won't unnerve you if you share your anxiety with experienced fathers and listen to their advice. The ups and downs of the stock market will be less of a headache if you change your approach from speculation to long-term investment.
Jack Tsang is a coach and trainer at Jacknowledge and a member of the Hong Kong International Coaching Community (info@coachinghk.org).
